Byebye Balcony Buddy
by stegogirl
Summary: AU Lorelai turns Christopher down on the balcony in "Christopher Returns" and goes home to paint the diner with Luke. While venting, Lorelai accidentally lets something slip.
1. Chemistry Clash

**AU Story about what I think should have happened on the balcony in the episode "Christopher Returns," some dialogue borrowed from this episode.  
Notice: This story will not be pure fluff. I can't stand pure fluff; gimme some **_**drama**_**. That being said, I am a Java Junkie for life, so you never have to worry that they will part ways in my version. It may be a bumpy ride though. Luke isn't really in this chapter; please forgive me! I promise if you stick around he is in Chapter 2. Also, I'm trying to do this from a third-person limited view, as in we don't know what the characters are thinking, we just know what they say and do.**

**Disclaimer - I claim to own nothing related to this show, except some worn down, much loved DVDs. Well, Seasons 1-6 anyway. O.K. you got me; I don't love the Season 6 DVDs. They gather dust.**

**Rating should not get worse than PG-13. Trying to write smut makes me want to giggle uncontrollably like a 5th grader.  
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**Scene: Season 1 Episode 15 Balcony shortly after Christopher joins Lorelai. Divergence happens after the italics end.**

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_Christopher took a drink from the flask he brought with him. "Take it," he said." And in an effort to further chronicle this balcony's history, we are now in the immediate vicinity of the spot upon which was Rory's initial emanation."_

_"Yes we are. Here's to Rory..." Lorelai takes a drink._

_"…the bright spot in all the darkness."_

_"…and how."_

_"You know," he said, "even if you hadn't gotten pregnant and everything had gone as planned, I still never would have made it through Princeton."_

_"Oh I don't believe that."_

_He sighed. "Yeah, well that's why you're you and I'm not."_ Christopher leaned in and kissed Lorelai, but she cut the kiss off short.

"Luke…" Lorelai said.

"No, my name is Christopher, you haven't had enough to drink that you've forgotten my name already, have you?"

"I have a paintin' date with Luke."

"Painting date? You're dating someone? Why can't you just go see a movie like normal people," Christopher joked, apparently trying to lighten the mood.

"It's not really a date. O.K., maybe it is. Or maybe not; I don't know! I'm not sure, but I think something may be happening."

"Then forget him. I love you and I'm gonna marry you," Christopher whispered, and moved in to give Lorelai another kiss. She moved back, but Christopher grabbed her and tried to kiss her. This time she pushed him away forcefully; he stumbled and nearly fell off the balcony.

"Here's a clue; when someone backs away when you're trying to kiss them, they don't wanna be kissed by you," Lorelai hissed at Christopher.

"Marry me, Lor. I can be there for you now. We can be a family."

"You don't even know what family is!"

"Man, woman, child, maybe more children. That's my family, and you're going to be a part of it." He tried to pull her closer again, but was rewarded with a verbal slap.

"Not with you. Christopher; I felt nothing when you kissed me. Do you understand? _Nothing_."

"Just marry me, we'll fall in love again." He approached her as she inched closer to the open window.

"It's not a matter of being in love, it's a matter of fireworks. Sparks. _Chemistry._ Don't you get it? There is none between us anymore and deep down you know it. You're just too hung up on this idea of family to admit it. When you kissed me, my first thought was of Luke. That alone proves that this isn't right. I don't want to hurt you like this but you're forcing me to."

As Christopher looked crushed, Lorelai stared off into the distance for a moment and then said, "I gotta go. Give me a thirty minute head start, and then call a cab. Get your stuff out of my house, say goodbye to Rory, and just go. You are still welcome to call and visit Rory, but _we_" she gestured between the two of them, "are through. For good." She turned and began to go awkwardly through the window back into her old room. "My parents have got to seal these windows up, I swear to God," she muttered.

They went downstairs in silence. Lorelai stopped abruptly at the entrance to the dining room; she could just hear her mother's voice from the kitchen. Christopher ran smack into Lorelai and she whirled around on him. "Please do as I asked. I've been through enough tonight."

"If that's how you really feel, then… O.K."

"That's how I really feel. Goodbye, Christopher."

She took a deep breath and calmly went through the dining room and into the kitchen. "So. Mom, that was some evening huh? The Old and the Stubborn instead of the Young and the Restless? Though I don't think it'll be the number one soap of all time, but we should get some viewers. What do you say we get out of here so things can settle down? You must be wiped, cause I know I am."

"Your daughter is having dinner, Lorelai," Emily said as if she was addressing a child. "You and Christopher haven't had dinner either. I can draw your father out of his study and we can have a proper dinner, together."

"Well, with all the fun here, we've kind of lost our appetites."

"Rory hasn't finished her dinner, have you Rory?" Emily asked, still looking directly at Lorelai.

"Actually, I'm not that hungry either." I was evident that she had done little more than re-arrange the food that was on her plate. "I also have a project due Monday; I need to put some finishing touches on it." Rory got up from her stool and gave her grandmother a kiss on the cheek. Emily, in turn was glaring at her daughter. It was a look that said, _we'll discuss this later, and at great length_.

* * *

As they got to the Jeep, Lorelai tossed the keys to Rory. "You drive, I have a phone call to make," Lorelai said.

"Um, Mom? Haven't you noticed Dad's not out here yet?"

"He's not coming back with us, Sweetie. He'll drop by the house to say goodbye to you and pick up his things."

"No! He can't leave already, it's too soon."

"I told him to go," Lorelai said reluctantly.

"Why?! You know how much I miss him."

"First he kissed me, and when I pulled back, he kept trying to kiss me. Then he told me that I was going to marry him, and be a family with him, and have more kids with him."

"He asked you to marry him?"

"No, he told me to. Big difference."

"What if he'd asked?"

"When he kissed me, there was nothing there. It was like kissing a brother. Well, not exactly. I wouldn't know what that was like, after all when my mother got to know me, there was no way she was going to have another, you know? She was probably afraid another kid would be even worse than me. Drive." Rory obediently started the Jeep and pulled out of the elder Gilmores' driveway as Lorelai used speed dial.

"Heey Luke. I know I should've been there like five minutes ago. I –

"No I'm not canceling; I want to help you paint.

"I do.

"_Yes_, I _do_. Look, there was an incident tonight between both sets of Rory's grandparents.

"No, this was a random set of grandparents she adopted; of course they're her dad's parents. It was a little ugly and very emotionally draining.

"No, I'm coming tonight; I think it'll be cathartic. We just left Hartford. I need to go home and change into mah paintin' clothes first, but then _you_, my friend, are next on my agenda.

"See ya soon; byyye."

After a while, Lorelai said, "It just isn't meant to be, Rory, I'm sorry."

Rory thought for a moment. "Don't be sorry. I understand; you can't help who you're attracted to. So I guess this means I need to abort my Parent Trap plans before I embarrass you." She giggled.

"And just how were you planning to get me out into the woods, missy?"

"I know a guy," Rory said, smirking.

They rode in silence for a while. "So, do you need to talk?" Lorelai asked.

"About Dad? I thought we just did. I'm O.K. Really."

"No, about all the warm and fuzzy family moments that went on tonight. You know all those crazy people saying those horrible things were directing them at me not you."

"They were directing them to you because you had me."

"No, they were directing them at me because I screwed up their big Citizen Cane plans. That's all."

"They don't even want to know me, do they?"

"That is not true. They are just so full of anger and stupid pride that stands in the way of them realizing how much they _want_ to know you."

"Yeah."

"It's their loss, and a pretty big one."

"Hey, I said I'm O.K. Don't make me call my guy."

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**A/N - Please, review. I need to know if I should continue this storyline or scrap it. I browsed over 200 pages of fan fiction only finding two stories that diverged at the same point, but neither were going the same way mine is.**


	2. Marking Territory

**Disclaimer - I claim to own nothing related to this show, except some worn down, much loved DVDs. Well, Seasons 1-6 anyway. O.K. you got me; I don't love the Season 6 DVDs. They gather dust.**

**Notice: This story will not be pure fluff. I can't stand pure fluff; gimme some **_**drama**_**. That being said, I am a Java Junkie for life, so you never have to worry that they will part ways for good in my version. It may be a bumpy ride though. I'm trying to do this from a third-person limited view, as in we don't know what the characters are thinking, we just know what they say and do.**

**Rating should not get worse than PG-13. Trying to write smut makes me want to giggle uncontrollably like a 5th grader.**

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Lorelai stood just out of view of Luke's diner, dressed in somewhat shabby looking clothes with a bandanna tied around her hair. She was twirling one of her loose ringlets around her index finger, looking conflicted. Finally, she seemed to make a decision about something, and walked over to the diner, almost bouncing. Before she could get to the steps the door opened, and Lorelai broke out into a bright smile.

"Hey! Told you I'd be here," she said to the flannel-draped man.

"You didn't have to come if you really had a bad dinner," Luke said.

"What dinner?" she scoffed. "We didn't make it to dinner, let me tell ya," she scoffed as she entered the diner.

"Well I turned the grill off, but I'll turn it back on if you want me to make you something. Oh, hey, I got some pie left. Tell ya what; I'll even throw some ice cream on top, and I'll hold the lecture. I anticipated your need for coffee, and there's some ready." He got out a cup, and poured her a cup of coffee. She sat down at the only table that didn't have chairs on top of it.

"Coffee is fine for now. Not sure I could eat anyway."

Luke raised an eyebrow. "You? Turning down pie a la mode? This _is_ serious." He sat down across her and waited for her to speak. When all she had done for a few minutes was drink her coffee and stare out the window, he said "So… wanna talk about it?"

"I think, no," she drained the cup. "Let's just get started painting."

"That bad, huh?" He returned her empty cup back to the kitchen.

She took a can of paint designated for the trim and meticulously dabbed it on the trim by the door. He poured some paint into a roller pan, and started to dip a roller in it. As he painted the ceiling, she finally began to talk.

"Christopher's parents. I almost can't believe them. They have one grandchild, and they can't even put their pride away for one evening to try and get to know her. And of course, I had to open my big mouth, so all hell breaks loose. My father almost hit someone. My father has probably only hit another man in college wearing boxing gloves and one of those Fred Mertz golden gloves pullover sweaters."

"I Love Lucy?"

"Nice catch. My father had a meltdown, first with Christopher's father, then with me! And then, I went out to the balcony of my old room – "

"You had a balcony in your room?"

"You wanted me to talk, let me tell my story?"

"My mistake, carry on."

"I went out there to be alone and cool off, but Christopher joined me and offered me Jose Cuervo! He also had the audacity to remind me that," she faltered. "Never mind that part…" she chuckled nervously.

At this statement, Luke visibly stiffened and didn't seem to notice that he was painting the same spot on the ceiling over and over.

"He kissed me. He told me he loved me, and that I was going to marry him and potentially have more children with him."

Luke inhaled sharply and his jaw was set in a hard line, he was still vigorously painting the same spot on the ceiling. "So," he said through clenched teeth, "you're with _him_ now?"

Lorelai didn't notice the tone of Luke's voice, and continued to babble. "No, of course not. Have you met me? When have I ever appreciated being ordered around? I backed away from him, and when I told him I didn't want to be kissed by him, he tried it again!"

_Swip, swip, swip, swip, swip, swip_, the paint roller said.

"He kept going on and on about how I could count on him now, and we could be a family." She chuckled humorlessly. "I had enough of that. I told him there was too late; that I didn't feel anything when he kissed me." The paint roller slowed. "That the first thing I thought of was you." She gasped as she realized she let this last part slip, and dropped her paintbrush getting __paint on her old sneakers.

The paint roller also dropped to the floor, leaving nice trail of paint on the floor tarp. The two friends were still facing away from each other.

"I said that out loud, didn't I?" she asked, covering her face with her hands.

"Yep."

They both stayed in place for a while, thinking, and as if choreographed, they turned toward each other at the same time. They looked at each other for a while, and Luke said slowly, "You mean the first thing you thought of was that you promised to help me paint right?"

She shook her head. "I thought about when we were hiding from Taylor behind the counter. It seemed like we were going to kiss. At least, that's what it felt like to me. I wanted to."

Luke cleared his throat and glanced down at his shoes, but didn't say anything.

"O.K., I was wrong then, good thing I didn't kiss you that would've been weird huh?" She bent over to pick up the paintbrush, flushed with embarrassment.

"You weren't wrong," he said quietly. When she stared at the brush and didn't say anything else, he asked, "Why did you leave then?"

"You're my best friend besides Rory and Sookie, and I was scared – "

"You were scared of getting hurt O.K. That's fine we can pretend this conversation never happened. Just go back to painting." It was his turn to bend over and pick up his painting instrument.

"I was scared of hurting you, Luke. Every time it seems like something is about to happen between us, I get scared. The last thing I want to do is hurt one of my best friends. But – "

"Forget about it. I'll just serve the coffee, you just drink the coffee."

"I think we should conduct an experiment," Lorelai offered.

"Sorry, my lab coat is at the cleaners."

"I'm serious. We're always on the cusp of something. It would hurt to lose my friend, but not finding out if it could be more is a mistake."

"Lorelai…"

"Please. Just a kiss. I want to know what it would be like." She closed the distance between them.

"Lorelai…"

"All three syllables, thank you!"

"Huh? What – " Something about the way she looked up at him, stopped him mid-question. "What the hell," he substituted and leaned down to kiss her. They started six inches apart from each other, but it quickly escalated with both of them wrapping their arms around each other. Lorelai gasped and pulled away. Luke scrambled back six feet and said "Sorry. You didn't like it. I'm sorry. Jeez! I'm stupid." He glared angrily at his feet.

She snickered. "You bumped me on the head with the paint roller."

He dropped the paint roller and was close to her again in an instant. "Are you O.K.?"

She was having trouble keeping a straight face. "Yeah. Fine. My bandanna however, is traumatized." She took it off and demonstrated the spruced bandanna. "Ooh, turn around."

"What?'

"Come on, let me see."

He turned around and she burst into a giggling fit, seeing that she had marked the back of his shirt with the paintbrush. He faced her again, perplexed. "I don't suppose you're going to let me in on the joke?"

"We painted each other…" she said mirthfully, gesturing with her paintbrush. "We've marked our territory." When she said that, the laughter stopped. They stared into each others' eyes for a while.

"You want to go out sometime. You know, like a date?" Luke, said, breaking the silence.

"I think we're on our first date," she replied.

"No. A date is where you dress up - hopefully in unpainted clothes - one party picks the other up for dinner, they go to a movie, you know."

"I think a date is whatever we want it to be. We can save the kissy-face for after our date though; we've got open paint here buster. We can talk and paint, and kiss goodnight." She paused, "Luke…"

"Changed your mind already?" He shied away a little.

"No. I want to be open with you. Let's go slow. I know I'm not supposed to talk about other men on the first date. Hah, too late for that. I broke up with someone two months ago, and then Christopher pulled his stunt tonight. I want to make this last. I'm dating a best friend. I don't want to hurt him, you know." She smiled playfully. "Hmm, one more kiss, then I can get back to painting. Wouldn't want the paint to dry, so you better get to it."

"You got it."

As they shared their second kiss, someone who was walking toward the diner stopped suddenly and gaped at the new couple. That someone then turned around and walked quickly in the direction they had come.

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**I was so touched by the speed that reviews came in last time that I wrote this chapter 6 hours after publishing the first. The delay comes from letting it sit around awhile to make sure it didn't smell first, though. Don't asked me who saw them, I'm not sure myself yet.**


	3. The Cat That Ate the Canary

**Apology - Apparently, I can't handle writing enhanced classes _and_ write stories at the same time. Even my personal stories that I don't share have suffered.**

**Disclaimer - I claim to own nothing related to this show, except some worn down, much loved DVDs. Well, Seasons 1-6 anyway. O.K. you got me; I don't love the Season 6 DVDs. They gather dust.**

**Notice - This story will not be pure fluff. I can't stand pure fluff; gimme some **_**drama**_**. That being said, I am a Java Junkie for life, so you never have to worry that they will part ways for good in my version. It may be a bumpy ride though. I'm trying to do this from a third-person limited view, as in we don't know what the characters are thinking, we just know what they say and do.**

**Rating should not get worse than PG-13. Trying to write smut makes me want to giggle uncontrollably like a 5th grader.**

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On the morning of the Firelight Festival, Lorelai was sitting at the counter at Luke's drinking coffee and chatting with Luke. The bell above the door jingled as it opened and a fresh looking, curly blonde-haired woman carrying traveling bags entered.

"Rachel," Luke said as he stared at the woman with an expression of awe.

Lorelai's mouth dropped open and she looked shocked. "Rachel? Your Rachel?" He nodded, and she turned around to face the new arrival. "You're Rachel?"

"Yup. I'm Rachel," she confirmed.

Luke asked, "What are you…I mean, I thought you were in the Congo or Philadelphia or something."

"Actually, though very similar to both the Congo and Philadelphia," she quipped, "I was in the Mideast."

"Oh. Guess that postcard must've gotten lost," he said sarcastically.

"Yeah, yeah, well things pretty crazy over there, not a lot of writing time. But I finished up my assignment, and I flew back to Chicago and I was walking through O'Hare, and I look up and there's a plane leaving for Hartford in like 20 minutes, and all of a sudden, I'm on it."

"Nice story." He was being cold to her.

"I should have called."

"No. Well, yeah, maybe."

"You look good."

"Thanks. You um, you look, you, you uh look…"

"He thinks you look good too. Right?" Lorelai offered.

"Right."

"And you do," Lorelai directed to Rachel.

"Thank you."

"I'm Lorelai."

"Oh yeah. She's Lorelai," Luke said.

"I'm Luke's…" she looked at Luke to see if he would help here, but he was still gazing fixedly at Rachel, "friend," she completed.

"Yeah. She uh, uh, works at the Independence Inn," Luke said helpfully.

"I run it, actually," Lorelai corrected.

"Sorry, she runs it."

"Seriously? I checked in last night. Wow, I love that place. That must be a pretty big job."

"It is! It's crazy. There's always something happening. Like, we just put these coffee makers in all the rooms, but only half of them work. They just like shake and gurgle, like they're having some kind of a fit." With a struggle, she ended her babbling. "Why were you in the Mideast?"

"I was doing a photo story, on how Palestinian and Israeli families have been affected by the violence."

"Uh huh, well, so you understand about the job pressure."

"Yeah."

"I'm gonna go." Lorelai grabbed her purse and turned to get off of the stool.

"Please, don't let me drive you away."

"That's okay, you're not. I have to go sit in a… closet or something. So, it was really nice to meet you."

"Yeah, you too."

"Okay, bye."

Luke finally breaks out of his trance and watches Lorelai flee from the diner.

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In Rory's room, Lorelai was helping Rory get ready for her big anniversary date.

"'Oh, we got new coffee makers.' Ugh! What was I thinking?"

"Well, you spent a lot of time picking out those coffee makers," Rory said.

"Oh yeah, I'm Mrs. Coffee." Lorelai jerked on the brush while it was still in Rory's hair.

"Ow! Okay, I'm still attached to the head."

"Okay, sorry. I'm a little worked up."

"Mom, it just Luke's ex-girlfriend."

"Well according to the whole town, she was the love of his life. What if he wants her back? He hasn't even asked me on a date since the painting thing, and I just don't know where this is going!"

"You said you wanted to go slow, maybe he is waiting for you to initiate. Although it didn't look like you two wanted to go slow when I saw you the night that Dad left." Lorelai's cell phone rang, she looked at it, sighed, and hit ignore. "You know, it doesn't help that you're not answering his calls. You could have solved this already."

"I just don't think I'm ready to hear that he's back with her."

"You don't know that – OW! OW! O.K., you are officially off hair duty."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to take it out on your hair."

"It's O.K. I just think it's a little early for Dean to see me completely bald."

"Right, that's more of a six-month thing."

"Hey, why don't you go over there now, before dinner. If you go to dinner this bummed, Grandma is going to know and she'll try to drill the reason out of you making you even more miserable in the process. It's a vicious cycle."

"I don't have time to go by the diner; you've taken up all of my free time this afternoon. If I leave for Hartford right now, I might barely make it in time."

"Then go after."

"I don't know…"

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After gaining an early escape from Friday Night Dinner, Lorelai drove home and wandered over to the Firelight Festival. She saw Rachel get up from sitting with Luke on a bench, and she sighed and said to herself, "Might as well get it over with," and went to sit down with him.

"I've been trying to find you all day! Where have you been?" Luke almost yelled.

"I had to help Rory get ready for her big date, then I had dinner at my parents' in Hartford, you know that's every Friday night."

"Oh, yeah, I just – Hey shouldn't you still be there?"

"Yeah."

"What happened?"

"Climbed out the window."

"O.K."

"That's it. You're not curious why?"

"No."

"That's what I love about you," she flinched as she realized what she said, but Luke didn't notice it.

"So you haven't been avoiding me?" He asked.

"Well, maybe a little," she said softly.

They sat together quietly and watched the bonfire for a while. Lorelai started, "You know, if you want to get back together with Rachel, I'll be O.K."

"What makes you think I want to be with her?"

"Well… the whole town talks about how she was the one who got away, and the way you two started at each other this morning made it seem like – "

"I _don't_ want to be with her," he interrupted

"Oh."

Luke stared down at his hands. "All of this stupid town talk. I don't know why you listen to it. The last time she was here; I proposed." He was in full rant mode now, "she said she needed to sleep on it. Well when I woke up the next morning, she and all of her things were gone. She didn't even leave me a note saying goodbye. She just took off. She's the 'everywhere but here' woman. If I let her back in, she would pick up and leave in a few months because that's what she does. She leaves. I'm amazed that she had the nerve to show up and act like nothing happened."

"Wow. I can't imagine anyone turning you down."

Luke smirked. "You and me never got around to planning our next date you know."

"Oh so now that was a date? I thought you said it didn't count?"

"I'm a compulsive liar."

"Good to know."

"What about tomorrow night?"

"I'm free. What have you got in mind?"

"It's a secret."

"No fair," Lorelai pouted.

"I like to be mysterious." He laid one arm on the top of the bench behind Lorelai.

"Luke Danes; international man of mystery."

"Why do I get the feeling that's from some stupid movie?"

"Because it is! Hello; Austin Powers. So much fun to mock." She scooted closer to Luke and leaned back against his arm. They either did not notice, or did not care that practically everyone was sneaking glances of them and gossiping gaily. They sat and people watched for a short time until Lorelai checked her watch and began to get up. "It's almost time for Rory's date to be over and I wanna get first dish on the details." Impulsively, she quickly kissed Luke on the cheek and said, "see you tomorrow."

A small smile played on his lips and he resembled the cat that ate the canary.

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**If anything seems out of character, or if there are continuity errors, I am willing to take the criticism! I may not change published chapters, but I will take all criticism into consideration when writing new chapters. [Sorry about all the dialogue from the show.** ]


	4. Epilogue

**I didn't realize until recently that the last chapter would have been a good ending. I'd like to skip the new couple mushy stuff and get into the serious committed couple issues. As usual: **

**Disclaimer - I claim to own nothing related to this show, except some worn down, much loved DVDs. Well, Seasons 1-6 anyway. O.K. you got me; I don't love the Season 6 DVDs. They gather dust.**

Post Rory's confession to Dean "I love you, you idiot!"

Lorelai glided into the diner and sat down at the stool closest to the curtain to the stairs to Luke's apartment. She put her hands on her chin, and had a dreamy half-sad, half-happy look about her as Luke pulled out a coffee mug and poured. "One cup of fine lines and wrinkles," he cracked, and Lorelai continued to stare into space. Luke put both of his hands on the counter and leaned close and said to her, "This is the part were you argue with me about my assessment of your coffee-drinking habits."

She blinked a few times and came back to the present. "Luke, my daughter is in love."

"Who – how – she hasn't dated anyone since Dean," he said.

"They are back together; it just happened this afternoon. She told him she loved him and now they are together again." Lorelai was still smiling sadly. "She has fallen in love and she's growing up, despite my best efforts." Her smile transformed into a playful grin. "And I think I may have yet another thing in common with her."

"What: that you don't need someone to hold your hand when you cross the street anymore?"

"Nuh-uh. I'm pretty sure I'm in love."

"Oh. Who's the lucky guy," he asked playfully.

"George Clooney of course," she answered. She indicted for him to lean in closer and lowered her voice to a whisper, "Now I am going to say something, and if you don't want to reply for now, that's O.K. –"

"I love you," they both whispered at the same time.

Lorelai gasped and pretended to be offended, "You totally tried to steal my moment!"

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**Keep an eye out for a follow-up story, though it will probably not pick right up where this one left off. Thanks for reading!**


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